Until God ordains otherwise, a man ought to bear patiently whatever he cannot correct in himself and in others. Imitation of Christ by John Kempis


During Advent season I began to write about examining my sins.  It is hard for me to find a good examination of conscience for my sins.  So I began to ask God to help me.  A friend sent me a book that gave me insight into my sinful use of my tongue.  That helped me so much that I ask God to show me what to write about next SELFISHNESS was loud and clear.  My first thought was Uh Oh, I am an only child, everyone says we are selfish. The first thing is what is the definition of selfish,  1 : concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one’s own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others. 2 : arising from concern with one’s own welfare or advantage in disregard of others a selfish act.

Then I looked up, “the strongman”, and other demons that work together with selfishess:

Jealousy (strongman}

















I never thought of Jealousy leading me to being selfish.  Yet when I allow myself to be jealous, I am the only one, no one else has a place in my thinking.  There is no understanding or compassion, just my needs.  I am the only one that understands or experiences God’s truths.  Or, what I am decieved in to thinking, what God’s truths really mean for all.

Matthew 23:25

Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!  For you clean the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside they are full of robbery and self-indulgence.

So lets look at Charity being love of God and love of neighbor and selfishness is all of our interests rooted in self interests.  My agenda is the most important to me and my time is for that agenda only.  If I had been Mary when the Angel of the lord said go and help Elizabeth.  My reply would have been are kidding me, walk all that way to help her, why can’t her husband help her ?  Mary said, “Let it be done to me according to your will.”   What Trust!  When Mary arrived Elizabeth greeted Mary with words from the Holy Spirit, ” Who am i that the mother of my lord should come to me?  And the child leaped in her womb. From that encounter ,filled with Holy Spirit, Mary already-overflowing immediately filled Elizabeth and her unborn son in her womb. Does this mean that when we are selfless and trusting of God, Our children will be healed.  Then what happens to our children when we are selfish and jealous.

Philippians 2:3

“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves”

Ego is a big problem to conquer.  We only want to talk about ourselves and take up the whole conversation and never ask about anyone elses life or only call someone when we need something or do, something for someone when it benefits us.  The worst is when we do not even notice that others are very upset, totally being self-absorbed.  Even worse is when we just do not care at all about anyone else. The problem this is  thinking that we have come because of hurts and then lied to ourselves, wrongly thinking this is the only answer to be happy.

Philippians 2:4-8

do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.  Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who although He existed in the form of god, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped.

We are bombarded in every area in the media with lies.  The only way to be happy is to have more, be well known, have a mercedes, pool, perfect children, and on and on.  When the real truth is TRUST GOD, surrender and do his will.

Our prayer should be Lord help me to be grateful and humble.  I know that too many carbs are bad for me.  I WANT THEM!!!  I am addicted to them.  I have committed over and over again to quit eating them except on Sunday.  I cannot tell you how many times I have been deceived to eat more.  Satan is just waiting to deceive us and tempt us.  We must learn to suffer for our own good.

2 Timothy 3:1-2

But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.  For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy.

It is very clear to me that we all need to change our thinking and habits of selfishness.  Our world is very scarey right now.  We are being lied to and deceptions are everywhere.  We have been lukewarm for far too long.  The Bible is not being taught or read.  Our time is spent in pleasures of the world and we have become complacent.  Hopefully we all wake up and see how needed we are to save souls with our good example.  ” Today, bring me the souls who have become lukewarm, and immerse them in the abyss of my mercy.” These souls wound My Heart most painfully.  My soul suffered the most dreadful loathing in the garden of Olives because of lukewarm souls.  They were the reason I cried out:” Father , take this cup away from Me, if it be your will. For them the last hope of salvation is to run to My mercy.”

“When we Christians behave badly, or fail to behave well, we are making Christianity unbelievable to the outside world.”


Ezekiel 34:8

“As I live,”  declares the Lord God, “Surely because My flock has become prey, My flock has even become food for all the beasts of the field for lack of shepherd, and MY shepherds did not search for MY flock, but rather the shepherds fed themselves and did not feed My flock;

My hope is that our shepherds pray to be ever present to those who need salvation.  Our Shephard’s are being tempted just like us in selfishness.  Our prayer should be let them see the truth and set them free to love.

“If conversion to Christianity makes no improvement in a man’s outward actions – if he continues to be just a snobbish or spiteful or envious as he was before – then I think we must suspect that his ‘conversion’ was largely imaginary.”


Guide us to see the graces God gives us as gifts not rewards and to respond with gratitude and humility, not pride and selfishness. Amen · ← St. Mary MacKillop ..

In my opinion Gods Grace is the answer to conquering sin. God chooses when we are given Grace and it is a free gift. If our hearts are closed by sin we are doomed. My journey, is to meditate and open my heart to God so He can fill me with all I need to do His will. I am grateful and also over joyed with Gods mercy and generosity.

I don’t know about you but examining my conscience everyday helps me to see more of the truth about myself. I find myself seeing my faults and the need to pray for Gods help. This has helped me become a better Christian example. I also have no time to judge other because I am too busy working on my own sins.


Examination of conscience:

1. Have I ignored the person needing help because of how they looked?

2. Has judge mental thinking kept me from confessing my sins?

3. Has discouragement kept me away from Gods house?

4. Do I only help someone who can help me more?

5. Do I keep things I borrow?

6. Do I ignore someone who is hurting and tell them you had something worse.

7. Do I have to be the one in control?

8. Do I need to be respected and honored at the cost of others humiliation?

10. Do I complain?

11. When God heals me do I say thank you?

12. Is it hard for me to see others success?

13. Is it ok when you are ignored?

14. Are you generous with your time, talent and treasure?

There is only one way to conquer our bad qualities and that is confess your sins and try hard to stop. Forgive yourself and others. TRUST GOD!!!

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